Just This Once

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Just this once, I'm going to be real. Honest truth is I don't know how to be real and blog. People see this. It's weird. I've been looking at blogs and came across one that interested me. The girl seemed sad and lonely. And very open about her feelings. I wonder how she does it. How does she say what's in her heart? As if it were a private journal. I keep a prayer journal. I pour almost everything out in it. Though, unfortunately, I've learned I can't be as free as I'd like in there either. So only in my thoughts and prayers am I truly free. Maybe that's the way it should be, I don't know.                              


I don't have it all together. Not even close. I don't think I ever will. But I keep telling myself that God has a plan. So when things don't go right, I chalk it up to... trials make you stronger. And you learn to desperately love God. If my life would've been so wonderful, I may not have even needed God. It would've been like putting a pretty cherry on the top of an already frosted cupcake. Just an extra. But for me, now, God is the cupcake... cherry and all. The different trials I have dealt with have shown me more of God, of His tender care for me, even and especially when I don't deserve it. Yet it seems so many people appear to have that perfect life or want to- who wouldn't?  But it's been in the depths that I've found God to be the most amazing. I've learned things about Him I wouldn't have learned any other way.
 Someday I really hope to figure Him out. The lower I go the deeper He goes. I can't believe some of the things He's done for me just to say, " I love you." He truly is a God that comforts.


Funny even when life isn't so great, the birds still sing and the sun still shines. There are plenty of things to be thankful for.  Even in the midst of trials God brings something beautiful. He never leaves me without hope.


If you are struggling today, God is there. In our darkest times, He comes the closest.

Comments

  1. caspersmomOctober 24, 2011 at 11:39 AM

    Yes JoHanna, the Sabbath post picture was taken from our deck. This is the way I keep in contact with God, is through His nature. I have always been like that. When I look back when I was a child I knew there was a God just by nature. I am so blessed that God made it possible for us to live here. When I'm tensed or bothered about something I can go out and sit on the deck I can feel my body relax. Where we used to live in Rancho Tehama was also a blessing, especially when we first moved out there. I felt like a pioneer with no paved roads and no phones and lots of wild life. It sure changed over the thirty years of being out there.

    When I look back on my life, I can see God was with me even when I wasn't with Him or even asked for His help. At this moment I know that is why I love Him so much. Actually I don't have it all together either. I wonder if that's because of our sinful nature. Actually I don't think we are able to figure God out until maybe when we are taken home to heaven. Then he will teach us all things including Himself. I love to see answered prayer in other peoples lives as well as some of my own. He is just an Awesome God.

    ReplyDelete
  2. JohannaOctober 24, 2011 at 10:44 PM

    Hey there! I agree nature is so peaceful and definitely brings me closer to God, too. there's something I do when I am having problems...I like to drive in the country and pray.God always seems so close when I do this. Prayer driving!
    You're very blessed to have such a view.

    God is soo much bigger and involved than we can even imagine. I can't figure Him out, but I sure have fun trying...watching Him! Definitely an awesome God!

    ReplyDelete
  3. CritFebruary 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM

    I agree that appreciating and soaking in nature is a great way to connect with God! It's celebrating the creation of the creator!
    I also agree that we will not have a full understanding of God until we are in His presence. He is just beyond what human minds can fully take in.
    As for not having it all together, it's simply because we're human and imperfect. I always say "I'm not going to be perfect until after I'm dead" and that's the truth.
    But the miracle is, that's OK! God understands that we are flawed, imperfect creatures--and he loves us just the way we are! It took me a long time to understand and embrace the concept that I cannot disappoint God! His love is unconditional and does not depend on what I do or how I perform. Not my perfection, but His! :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. JohannaFebruary 13, 2012 at 10:52 PM

    Thank you, Christa, for reading and for your comment :) Very well put.

    ReplyDelete

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