Life in His Hand

Cruel how the mind plays tricks on you. As I was laying in bed this morning, contemplating the day, trying to be thankful to God for what I have, my mind slipped into a state of semi-sleep and the phone rang. I answered it and heard a distant voice, stopping to call. "I had to pick up so and so..." Sometimes he used to call when he'd be out. I heard other voices in the background. I had not heard his voice in so long and was happy to hear it...then I woke up. It's hard to lose a friend, someone who felt so dear. As I lay there, the tears spilled down my cheeks, as they often do, when the thoughts come. Dreams are worse.

Had a dream last night that my husband gave me two little bags of chocolate, trying to make up. I looked at them and just threw them onto the floor where he was standing, saying, "Chocolate isn't going to fix our relationship!" I don't know where that came from; I haven't had chocolate in over a month. Two good points: I didn't accept the chocolate and I didn't accept him back. So what's up with chocolate? Well you see a couple of months ago, I heard a sermon. The man giving it had a wayward daughter at a university and he had been very concerned about her behavior there. He decided to fast from something that he consumed that wasn't good for him and to pray. And with tears in his eyes, he said that within two weeks, she decided to move back home. Our problems have been pretty ongoing, seemingly neverending. I was always dealing with it. I decided to fast something that was near and dear to my heart...candy! I was eating way too much of the s...

Interest in dreams When I was 17, I had a strong interest in dreams and dream interpretation. I bought a book, which I studied, and learned all about things such as becoming lucid in dreams (being aware you are dreaming or "awake") and how to teach yourself to fly. It also contained the meanings for many common symbols and incidents that occur frequently in dreams.  So I actually taught myself to fly by repeating to myself, as I fell asleep, that I was going to fly (power of suggestion). It was funny, I sort of ran and then flapped my arms like wings. It took a little practice, but eventually I flew. I'm sure this comes naturally for most people. I also was able to wake myself up in my dreams or become "lucid" and control them to a certain extent. Not a good thing to do.  I was into the heavy-metal lifestyle and dreams sort of fit with my interests at that time, which also included astrology.  I remember having a lot of nightmares. Certainly due to the fact tha...