Life in His Hand

Watched my Sophie graduate last night, all sparkly! I thank God every time one of my kids graduate. I think of the chaos in my own young life and have to just praise the Lord that He found me and we're doing things differently. I have stopped the pattern that could have continued from one generation to the next. I fully believe that God just had such an enormous impact on the future of my kids' lives by changing my life so dramatically. I didn't do well in school because I had too many problems. I was bright but I didn't fit in and my life was just not designed to enable me to succeed in school. I am so proud of Sophie!!!!

It is a strange feeling to be 40, feeling soo young and have a 24 year old daughter! I am proud of her. She is starting her job at a hospital tomorrow in the cancer center as a medical assistant. She has been going to school for several years getting her prerequisites out of the way so she can take the nursing program. But there's a long waiting list. A couple years ago she decided to take the year off and take the MA course. It's a good thing because now she has a way to provide for her kids and get some experience in a medical setting while she waits to take the nurse's training. She posted a pic of her work badge on Facebook and I looked at it and just thought about her when she was first born as her dad held her next to me on the delivery table...I remember those wide-open eyes and that little Jenessa face. Coming out of a 17 year long bad relationship (not her father) and looking at what I have accomplished or the lack of what I have accomplished, I have wondered if ...

Blessings come in small packages this year. I am just really grateful for the little things. Just hearing my kids laughing and carrying on, smelling cookies baking in the oven, looking at our cluttered tree--decorated with lots of sentimental ornaments the kids have made over the years. Our tree is fake and only about 4 feet tall. It's on a decorator table in the corner. Usually, we would have a big tree but our house is just too small for one now. The amount of ornaments on our tree is more than enough for a tree twice it's size..yep, cluttered. Cluttered with sweet memories from the past. Spent last Sunday with my dad. It was our annual Christmas get-together and we always have pizza and root-beer floats. All my kids and grandkids were there. It was nice visiting with my dad. I don't see him often enough. The kids always have a great time. He cracked me up this year. He brought us all into his extra room and on two long tables he had lots of Christmas stuff laying o...

I have a simple, little house, but it contains everything and everyone I love the most. I walk in the door and see pictures hanging on the wall that speak to me. I feel the warmth and smell apple cinnamon candles, see my books at home on their shelves and I am wrapped in colors that I love. I see my kids' clutter strewn all over the floor...backpacks, shoes, you name it and it isn't long before I'm handing out the chores. Home sweet home. I can especially appreciate it now. I know how fleeting it is. One day these guys, too, will grow up and leave me like my older two did. And boy it sure didn't take too long for that to happen. So I need to cherish every day, every moment we have together. I am thankful to have the kids brighten my daily life. What a privilege. Some places remind me of just how fortunate I really am. People who are elderly, alone, they're homes aren't kept up the way they used to be. Their kids and families are gone and one by one they...

I am soo sentimental about things! I save old letters and cards and little mementos. I even have a hard time...well actually...I don't delete emails from friends. I have a friend that I email back and forth a lot. This friend deletes my emails (I'm so offended!!!!!). I save his, thinking...what if something were to happen to this person, I'd want to go back and  read them. Is that weird? Oh well. I am as sentimental as they come. I saved a lot of my kids' baby stuff and things I wrote when I was a kid. I have some of my grandmother's things and even my pink Barbie dress. I'm sure the list could go on and on and on... Okay, so we have an old picnic table out in our yard. It no longer can be moved--it's so rickety. It will literally fall to pieces if we try to move it. I mentioned getting rid of it and my youngest daughter Amanda, was like no mom, we have so many memories with that table. All the birthday parties and bar-b-ques. She said it more than once. A...

This morning as I was thinking about waking my kids up, I thought about just how unique they are. What got me thinking along those lines was my daughter, Savannah. She gets to sleep in a little longer than the other two. Regular High School just didn't fit her very well and so now, as I've mentioned before, she is in a charter school that is an independent study program where she attends a few classes a week at the campus. And this is working out really well so far. Savannah is on the quieter side (most of the time). She is somewhat an introvert and has always been a homebody type, content with reading a good book. She is also artistic. She was my sweetest child when she was small. She has always been very studious and organized in her schoolwork. That is why this type of school arrangement can work for her. I have five kids and they all are so different. My oldest daughter, Jenessa was always so driven in school. She's not afraid to do anything, it seems. She's on...

Had an amazing night! The final night of our youth series. Two skater guys, one with long hair, came with my nephew. This young guy reminded me so much of the guys I used to hang out with. I was into heavy-metal. I gave all the kids a Bible promise book with a bookmark that had Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. I also got to tell a very quick testimony about my and my sister's youth. How we were pretty wild. And how nothing in the world compares to having a relationship with God. The one kid was listening. I looked right into his eyes and said God has a plan for your life, He has a plan for each one of us. He was touched I could tell. I was pretty emotional about it myself. It was a great night and I am on a spiritual high. I have ALWAYS   wanted to tell kids like that about God. Kids that are the way I was. Tonight I finally got the opportunity. So I pray ...

Yesterday, I overheard my youngest daughter (nine-years-old) having a conversation on the phone with a friend from school. It was quiet in our house - for once - and so I could hear her friend on the other end, as well. Friend - "Hey are you going to give Maria a Valentine card?" Mandie - "Uh...yeah, I'm giving one to the whole class. Besides that would be kind of mean." Friend - "Oh, well I wanted to know if you guys weren't gonna give her one because then I wouldn't." I was proud to hear Mandie doing the right thing so easily. The thought that first came to mind when I heard her say that was - I wonder what would happen if we all handled things like that? To put other people's feelings first. I think I am going to try this.                                                                       ...

In church today we there were lots of kids in our class! We're growing and I think it's awesome! Our church has had problems for awhile and I finally see that things are turning around for us. I am so thankful. It does something tremendous to my heart to be able to have the opportunity to influence kids for God. Show them the right path and help them along on their journeys. Oh if they can get it young, what a lot of heart-ache they could avoid. I wasn't raised in a Christian home, but exposed to church a little. I got into a lot of trouble and was into heavy metal and very rebellious. My home life wasn't stable. I messed up in school. I seriously wonder what could have been different if I would have had someone like who I am now guiding me then. Hmm... well I "have been there done that" and have many warnings and much to preach about to these kids. I tell them "never smoke, do drugs or drink", "let God choose the person you will marry", ...