Life in His Hand

Lately I've been feeling a little scattered--like the leaves of fall. So many thoughts fluttering in all different directions. Wondering where I belong. Wondering what I should be doing. Wondering , wondering, wondering. It is said that someone cannot do too many things at once and do them all well--I have been wondering where to trim, and how to whittle my activities down to make sure my highest priorities get top attention. So for me, this requires lots of prayer--asking for wisdom and God's plan for my life. It's so easy to get side-tracked. Over this past week, I've been feeling a little burned-out. I think it's partially because of all the emotional stress I've been under. Also, I tend to let the amount of kids I teach or who comes to our Saturday night youth program, get to me--lately our group has really shrunk. So I was sort of losing my spark. Today, with a very small group in class, I was blessed to have two wonderful helpers who stepped in and parti...

Recently, I reconnected with a man I haven't seen in years through Facebook, of course! I saw these bright blue eyes staring out at me from his profile picture, a face that looked so familiar, but I couldn't place this person. I noticed my aunt was a mutual friend, and so I accepted his request after examining his wall. Then I quickly hopped onto chat to ask my aunt how I knew this guy. She guessed from school or a concert--but I knew that wasn't the case. After accepting his request, and bombarding my aunt with questions, he came on and started chatting with me. I was a bit embarrassed that I couldn't remember just how I knew him, but he so graciously filled me in on the details and it all flooded back. We were not Christians when we'd stop and chat on the main street sidewalk, in front of the comic book shop where he worked. We didn't know each other well, but I remember him being a pleasant person. We were living our own lives the best we knew how, longing ...

As you may know, my sister moved to Florida a few months ago. Her husband has an aunt, here in town, that has cancer. She's not doing very well at all. Her husband is having a really tough time with it as well. They do not go to church or have any spiritual support system. My sister tells me that if she doesn't make it, the husband will be completely lost without her because they're inseparable. Of course, my sister and her family are very concerned for them...and also very far away. The Assignment A few weeks ago, she asked if I and our aunt would make casseroles, my sister providing the finances, for the woman and her family--that they could freeze and use as needed. My sister, feeling like she wanted to do something, but feeling helpless, came up with that idea so this family could hopefully see God's love through us as Christians. This week, my aunt and I are going to plan, shop, cook and deliver the food for these people. We'll share as we have an opening an...

To Blog or Not to Blog... And that is only the first question. I've had this idea floating around in my mind for awhile. Problem is it doesn't leave. So here I am...finally giving in to it. I am used to writing my thoughts down. It's  sort of a compulsion of mine or maybe just an addiction. Either way, I'm trapped. Usually I write things in a prayer journal for for only One Person to read, so this is definitely different. It feels strange and foreign, but as with anything, if I continue and do it often enough, it'll become more comfortable and maybe even...normal?   A few of my other questions are:  What should I write? What if nobody reads this? What if somebody actually reads this? Will I say something I shouldn't? Will I edit myself out? Why am I so insecure and lastly...does anybody even care? Not really. So I'm going to do it.  ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

I decided to start reading the Bible to the girls each evening. I thought it would be good if I let them pick a topic that we could read about. I asked them what they'd like to hear about and they said--the end of the world. So we went to Mathew 24. Verses 36-39 really stuck out. 36  “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.  37  As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.   38  For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark;   39  and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. We talked about Noah and how life was seemingly normal for everyone besides he and his family. They were consumed with building the ark and preaching about the coming flood. T...

I guess the reason I am struggling so much lately, is I just don't know who I am anymore. I found this cute video on YouTube and just wanted to share it and my own thoughts about it. I used to know where I belonged. I used to know what I was supposed to be doing. My life and roles were pretty well-defined. Even in less than perfect circumstances (way less than perfect!) I had some sense of who I was. Like the woman in the video, my life was centered around kids and family. Now I'm feeling rather uprooted. So when I saw this video yesterday, I just thought, well where do I bloom now? I shared it on Facebook and let it go. This morning, I woke up and wrote in my prayer-journal--I pray that You will cause me to bloom where I am planted. Being a single mom with not a lot of money seems to be my lot  in life. How can I bloom right here? Please help me to improve my lot. To have many beautiful flowers bloom and green grass grow right here in my lot. What's your lot?...

There's a big, big world out there... I've been praying a whole lot about what I'm supposed to be doing with my life now. I have NEVER felt as vulnerable as I do now. Everything's so up in the air. Major life changes are happening as if with a mind of their own. I guess I really have little control over most things. One thing I think of is the fact that my daughter's moving an hour away with my grandbabies. My sister also recently moved away, my kids will probably only be spending half their sabbaths with me. It's almost as if all the old is being torn away, and everything that was once so familiar will be replaced with new and different things. I'm in limbo...between what was and what will be. It's a weird place to be. I'm really praying for guidance and direction. As we've had some struggles lately, I've seen God use people to help with our needs. It has been amazing and faith-building. I believe God will make things clear to me and ope...